We need your help ! Come work for free !

Today ME is all about the way of the future: multimedia.
I got the following voicemail on my home answering machine.

Hear it :

Background Story: I quit this job a year and a half ago. Back then I had two clueless Ivy League summer interns. The entire output of their summer was writing a macro to load and compare two text files from mapping and load modeling systems for a utility company. They were out of date by about 10 years. The interns were EE majors and didn't know their ass from a computer. Despite abysmal knowledge of programming, excel and the corporate systems they were hired to work with, the duo somehow managed to crank out enough code to 'massage the data' and look like they weren't reading LOTR and Narnia books for 12 weeks.
This spreadsheet is the culmination of 1) 6 month 'research project' by a union employee, the culmination of which is a promotion to a prominent/cushy management position 2) formal thesis paper (internally) published by a management associate hire (MSci in EE) from some CUNY, the culmination of which is a promotion to a prominent management postion. I think there was some award for his quality of work 3) 2 years worht of effort of several SMEs in collaborating on the paper/research/implementation 4) two Ivy League EE summer interns working on implementation full time. Sadly, these man (&woman) hours are completely wasted unless I call them back.
It appears that everybody that had their hands on the spreadsheet quit or feigns retrograde amnesia. Whoever got stuck with 'figuring it out' obviously has ZERO Excel/VBA skills (and was thus appointed). He probably can't get through some configuration options. Perhaps he's encountering some security features I've built in (for shits 'n giggles). Either case, the primary reason I left this company is so I wouldn't have to deal with this kind of bullshit, but apparently I cannot escape.
The big question is whether the person leaving me a voicemail is willing to comply with the principles set forth in the blog name. It seems the 'machine' constraint will be satisfied, but the 'earning' paradigm is still up in the air. Here are my possible case scenarios:
1. I call, its a short conversation because I don't remember anything
2. I call, its a long conversation for the same reason as above
2.5 I call, its a long conversation for the same reason as above. The guy figures out email and send me the spreadsheet. I still can't help because of external dependencies (this thing FTPs somewhere)
3. I call, its a short conversation. I agree to come in. Fix it and meet up w/ old coworkers.
4. I call, its a short conversation. I agree to come in for a fee. Fix it and meet up w/ old coworkers.
5. I call, its a short conversation. I agree to come in for a fee. Fix it and meet up w/ old coworkers. I sucessfully upsell : convert the whole thing to a DB app or a shell script.
5.5 I call, its a short conversation. I agree to come in for a fee. Fix it and meet up w/ old coworkers. I sucessfully upsell : convert the whole thing to a DB app or a shell script. Pigs fly.
6. I don't call. Everyone lives happily ever after.

I like 5 then 6, but I think 2 is very likely.
More to follow. I guess I'll call tomorrow. What would you do ? leave comments.